


Exactly what would happen if somebody broke in

by mothermachinegun



Series: Fratstuck [16]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Burglary, Collegestuck, Humanstuck, M/M, Mild Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-12
Updated: 2013-11-12
Packaged: 2018-01-01 07:49:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1042231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mothermachinegun/pseuds/mothermachinegun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Take this, call 911. Stay here.”</p><p>“You aren’t seriously gonna-”</p><p>“We’re gonna be okay.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Exactly what would happen if somebody broke in

Kurloz moving is what wakes you up. He first lifts his head up, and then sits up sharply, and you feel for him in the darkness as the blankets are pulled bodily from you.

“The fuck are you doing?” You mumble, pulling them back up to your chest and rolling over, propping up on one arm.

He hold a hand up for silence. You listen.

From somewhere in the frat house, you hear rustling. Something being moved.

It’s just another one of the frat members, you reason, one of the ones you don’t hang out with. There’s only a dozen or so members to begin with, right, so what are the odds that one of them has just gotten up to get something to drink in the kitchen?

Glass breaks, and you clutch Kurloz’s arm sharply and sit bolt upright. “…dude what do we do?” You breathe, feeling a cold, horrified feeling settle into your stomach. He looks at you for a long moment and then stands up, beckoning for you to follow as he crosses the room, very quietly turning the handle to the door and opening it. It doesn’t creak, and for this, you’re thankful.

You follow him wordlessly into the bathroom across the hall, which you find odd because it’s Dirk and Horuss’s bathroom. It’s a cramped space and you sit abruptly down on the side of the tub as Kurloz closes the door behind you. At some point, you don’t know when, he’s grabbed his phone and has taken it out to use as a flashlight. There are three doors in this room- the one you’ve just come into, one door on the left for Horuss’s room, and one on the right leading to Dirk’s.

Kurloz opens Dirk’s door first. You sit, very quietly in place, trembling with nerves, as he disappears into the next room, leaving the door open, and you hear a rustle and Dirk’s voice going, “The fu-” and then silence.

You hear more thudding from the kitchen. You flinch, covering your face, wondering what exactly is going to be done about this. What if the burglar had a gun? What if they were going to shoot someone? “Fuck,” You whisper to yourself, curling your knees up a bit and reaching up to wipe hair away from your eyes.

You hear Dirk and Kurloz dicking around in the other room. You’re not sure if Kurloz has even said anything, but why would he? He doesn’t talk to Dirk. He doesn’t talk to Horuss, either, and he’s sure as fuck not going to try reasoning with a burglar.

Dirk enters through the ajar door in pajama pants and a t-shirt. He’s not wearing his sunglasses, but he is, for reasons that you will never understand, holding a katana of all things, and he shoulders it as he crosses through into Horuss’s room.

“Hey. Get up.”

“Dirk?”

“Ssh. There’s someone in the house. Get up, quiet-”

You hear Horuss’s bed creak and then Kurloz is joining you at the tub, he’s switched the flashlight off and presses the phone into your hands.

“We’re gonna be okay.” He whispers to you, “Take this, call 911. Stay here.”

“You aren’t seriously gonna-”

“We’re gonna be okay.” He repeats, standing up and then joining Horuss and Dirk in the other room, shutting it behind him. You take the phone, and, with trembling hands, start to dial the three numbers you never thought you’d have to.

“911, what is your emergency?”

“Someone broke into our house. He’s still here. My name’s Mituna, I’m at 740 Fraternity Village Drive Alpha Tau Alpha house at Beforus State University-”

You hear the door open from Horuss’s room, and you whimper.

“-three guys just went to go confront him oh my god what do I do-”

“Try and stay calm, Mituna, are you alone, are you armed?”

“I’m locked in a bathr- oh god,” You gasp sharply as you very clearly and very audibly hear somebody’s voice, you can’t figure out whose-

“WHAT THE FUCK-”

And there’s more glass breaking, shouting, a commotion- you cringe as you hear more awful thudding and was that Dirk unsheathing his katana? You feel a though you could throw up, terror rising in your throat, as the sound of something hitting the floor makes the house shake, and you choke on your next words which are, “Please help I don’t know what’s going on-”

“Watch out!”

“Motherfucker! GET THE FUCK BACK HERE!”

There are footsteps coming from upstairs, and you let out a low groan, barely listening to what the 911 dispatch was telling you. Something about how the cops were on their way and to stay calm and remain in place. The rest of the fraternity, the upstairs-lurkers that you never knew very well, had awoken, you could hear them milling around and heading down the stairs.

“…Dirk, don’t kill him.”

You practically break down the bathroom door in an effort to scramble out into the kitchen. Someone has turned the lights on and the sight before you makes you just about sag to the ground in relief.

Horuss is sitting on a kid clothed in black. He has a split-lip, which he’s dabbing at with the hem of his shirt. There’s blood everywhere. You’re reminded that, despite the fact that Horuss is the most mild-mannered guy you know, he could probably throw you half a football field’s length, and overpowering Horuss Zahhak was not an easy feat. Especially if his partner in crime is holding a fucking sword to your throat. Dirk sits calmly next to him, the guy struggles.

“Cops on their way?” Dirk asks you, looking up.

“The fuck’s going on?” Another voice.

“Did that guy try and break in here?”

And then you realize something.

“UM. Where the fuck is Kurloz?”

“He took off after the other guy.” Dirk explains, and this time, you do actually fall to the ground, feeling suddenly as though you’re going to faint. “There were two. The other guy got out through-” And he gestures with one hand, and you stare at the smashed bay window. The icy breeze drifts in, and you shiver. “He chased after him.”

“AND NOBODY FUCKING THOUGHT TO STOP HIM?!”

“Kinda busy with the guy beating the shit out of my friend here.” Dirk gestures at Horuss, who rolls his eyes. You hear police sirens, lights flash red and blue as cars fill the cul-de-sac, and Horuss looks up.

“Time for you to go.” He says to the guy who writhes frantically beneath him, stricken with fear.

The next half-hour is an absolute fucking blur. The guy gets hauled off in handcuffs, an EMT sits in the living room and tries to stop the blood flow from Horuss’s mouth while a cop questions him and then Dirk and then you, but you don’t have a whole lot to tell him because you’re trying to choke back terrified sobs.

Once done, you sit on the couch and you try not to be sick, because Kurloz isn’t there, and another one of the cops has gone out to look for him and you just curl up and turn his phone over and over and over again in your hands.

Dirk is using his cell to call the AWOL people: Rufioh, Jake, Cronus and Kankri. You can hear his voice, sounding so far away, “Kurloz went after the other guy, hasn’t come back yet. Uh- not well. I’ll keep you posted.”

You lay down. You stare at his phone. Like it’s going to ring. And you wait.

“Maybe you should go back to bed.” Horuss tries to say, his voice somewhat warped. You can hear the EMT say, “If you have ice cubes, you should suck on them- or popsicles. It’ll numb the pain, bring the swelling down.”

“I can’t,” You say hoarsely, “Are you kidding? I’d never be able to sleep.”

Horuss frowns, and then hisses sharply as the EMT applies something that obviously burns like a motherfucker. “Dirk, did you call Rufioh yet?”

“Yeah, he’s gonna head down here.” Dirk sinks into the armchair, staring at the broken window across the room, which one of the cops is attempting to tape over with a blue tarp. “I hope we’ve got insurance.”

Then, all at once, another gust of icy wind blows through the room as the door opens, and lo and fucking behold it’s Kurloz, and you leap to your feet and drop the phone and practically trip over the EMT to get to him.

“Kurloz…”

He’s so cold as you bury your face into his chest, and he wraps his arms around you and god do they feel strong. He’s shivering. You just want to warm him.

“You okay?” Dirk has stood up as well, “Get the guy?”

Kurloz shakes his head. You slump against him, rocking on the balls of your feet, and he pats your hair soothingly. He doesn’t appear to be hurt, but you pull away and examine him critically, and shit you can feel your throat constrict and there are tears in your eyes and you look up at him and try to speak but nothing comes out.

He leans down, whispers into your ear. “Go back to bed. I’ll be right there. Gotta talk to the motherfuckin’ cops.”

At long last he joins you back in his room, and it’s dark and eerily quiet and probably about 4 in the morning by now. You haven’t even bothered to check the time, too busy taking deep breaths to calm yourself because he’s okay. He’s okay.

“Oh my god-” You reach for him again as he sinks down onto the bed beside you. He comes willingly, dragging you into his lap as he leans on the headboard. He’s still so cold. You try and worm closer, as close as you can, and you rest your head on his shoulder. “…what were you thinking?”

He shrugs.

“You’re crazy. You could have gotten hurt.”

He shakes his head.

“Bro…”

He shrugs again.

“Talk to me!” Your voice, when it comes out, breaks halfway through the phrase, and shit it happens again you’re right on the verge of tears. “Kurloz… don’t… don’t scare me like that again, I-”

“I’m all right, Tuna. Easy.” He reaches up and brushes your hair away from your face, and then you just break down and cry weakly into his shoulder. “I wasn’t gonna get hurt. I know how to take care of myself.”

“You don’t know that!” You whine, “What if something terrible happened?”

“Then something terrible woulda happened. That’s life, bro.”

For some reason you flash hot with fury, and you jerk away from him, feeling tears stream down your face, and you breathe hard through your teeth as you growl, “Don’t. Say that. Again. Ever. Do you hear me? You- you could have been-…”

He tries to pull you back into his arms. You come willingly, unable to do much else other than just weep bitterly. It hits you, how terrified you were, how close you came to actually losing him, and that thought, more than anything else, makes your body seize in distress.

“…babe.”

You can’t answer him, too busy shuddering.

“Babe. I didn’t motherfuckin’ all mean anything by it. You know that. I, um.” Kurloz clears his throat. “I’m sorry. It was kinda stupid. I was just all- fuckin’ acting on adrenaline and shit, and… you know. Sorry.”

“I’m just glad you’re okay.”

You keep your eyes closed but he moves somewhat. “Lay down, bro. I’m tired.” Shifting with him, you resume curling at his chest, tightly close to him in the twin bed as he pulls the blankets up over you. You can hear, faintly, the door opening and closing and then Rufioh’s voice going, “Oh my god are you okay-”

It’s quite lucky, you realize, that everybody is okay. The guys hadn’t been armed. Horuss just got his face re-arranged a bit. And Kurloz- was okay. He’s in your arms, playing with your hair and kissing your forehead.

Tomorrow you’ll wake up and realize that the xBox is gone and so is 60$ of Dirk’s money that he had stuck onto the fridge to pay Horuss back for a robot part, things you assume are in the possession of the guy that got away.

But tonight you just think about how lucky you are. How lucky you are to have this guy, this stupid, reckless guy that chased a robber down, barefoot, in November, without a fucking shirt on, and came away unscathed. If that’s not luck, you’re not sure what is.


End file.
